By Jae-Ha Kim
Chicago Sun-Times
November 10, 2004
Singletons, take note. “Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason” is just a couple days from opening, and that’s reason enough for many of you to celebrate. While all the “smug marrieds” are at home arguing about whose turn it is to pay the bills (or bathe the children), you can kick back with your bitchin’ friends, enjoy a cocktail and revel in all things Bridget.
A Bridget Jones-themed party is the perfect soiree to throw for those who have rid themselves of the New Year’s resolutions they made almost a year ago. So what if you haven’t lost any weight yet? Our Bridget is diet-challenged as well. While smoking may make you a pariah at any other soiree, Ms. Jones and her crew revel in it. [Note: We ourselves don’t condone this nasty habit.] And if you’re fond of Chardonnay, all the better. You don’t have to worry about what drink to serve (or bring) to this year’s Bridget party.
We believe there will be enough stress dealing with what to wear to the upcoming holiday parties. It’s really quite cruel. First they fatten us up with Thanksgiving, and then they expect us to slim down a month later for Christmas and New Year’s Eve parties. It just doesn’t make any sense. So for your Bridget Jones party, it’s only reasonable to let yourself go a little.
Don’t worry about squeezing into those impossibly tight Seven jeans or the little black dress that is much too little to be worn anymore. Invite the girls over to relax in their favorite pajamas. In fact, encourage them to wear their non-sexy granny panties underneath as well. Why worry about panty lines? If men are invited to the party, ask them to wear their most awful holiday sweaters a la Mark Darcy (Colin Firth’s character). Having them dress up like snazzy Daniel Cleaver (Hugh Grant) will be too much pressure on everyone. Who wants to run around in PJs and granny panties when a guy’s working a couture suit across the room?
We know Bridget is always running around like a chicken with its head cut off trying to pull off something seemingly as simple as the promise of homemade soup. Don’t you fall for that mistake. Remember that Chardonnay we were talking about earlier? Make sure you have plenty on hand. You also should stock up on some designer water and diet drinks for the wannabe Bridgets. Ice cream always is a good idea. And pizza. Don’t you dare make it from scratch. Rather, order it so its delivery will coincide with your guests’ arrival.
If you’re feeling particularly ambitious, call your favorite caterer to see if they can whip up a turkey and curry buffet for your shindig. Bridget fans may recall her mum was fond of serving the combo at her annual Christmas parties. The menu makes a recurrence in the sequel.
Since Bridget’s a compulsive calorie counter, have your guests guesstimate how many calories they’ve consumed during the night. At the end of the evening, calculate whose actually was the closest to reality. The winner gets a bottle of Chardonnay to take home.
For entertainment, buy or rent a copy of “Bridget Jones’s Diary.” (If you want to go all out, pre-order tickets for a matinee showing of “The Edge of Reason,” which you and your guests can attend the morning after.) Also, have small notebooks so everyone can “journal,” as our fair-haired heroine is so fond of doing. Pass the books around and read each other’s entries out loud and see if you can guess who said what about whom. Caveat: Depending on how many glasses of wine you’ve had, this exercise could result in some guests leaving early. Have the number of a good cab company so you can call taxis for your non-sober friends.
Also, if you’ve got a karaoke machine programmed with “Like a Virgin,” dust it off for your party. In “The Edge of Reason,” Bridget ends up teaching the song to non-English speaking cell mates in Thailand. (Don’t ask — you have to see it to believe it.) Those of you who are technologically challenged can just stick to leading a sing-along to Madonna’s CD.
And finally, consider signing up for a trial membership to an online dating service such as www.matchmaker.com or www. match.com. We’re not saying you should be looking for love online. But we guarantee it’s much more fun than passing an orange around (via your chins) or playing Truth or Dare.
And who’s to say you won’t find your own Darcy online? Of course, the flip side of all this is if you’re anything like our Ms. Jones, you’ll more than likely find a Daniel.
Maybe it’s not such fun being a “singleton” after all.
