K.Will’s “No Sad Song For My Broken Heart” explores a one-sided gay relationship

“내게 어울릴 이별 노래가 없어 (No Sad Song For My Broken Heart)”

Three days ago — on June 20 — K.will released “내게 어울릴 이별 노래가 없어 (No Sad Song For My Broken Heart),” which is a stunning continuation of the the storyline from 12 years ago. The accompanying music video is about 6½ minutes and stars both Ahn and Seo. Unfortunately, Dasom doesn’t make even a cameo appearance.

I strongly encourage you to watch this video before reading further, because I’m hoping that we can discuss what the heck is happening. There is a lot going on that’s open to interpretation.

The video starts off with a closeup of Seo’s watch, which has a cracked glass dial. But we can clearly see that the time is 10:11. And the date indicates that it’s the 12th. These numbers are significant, because K.will dropped his video for “이러지마 제발 (Please Don’t…)” — this song’s prequel — on October 11, 2012 — or 10/11/12.

Seo leans against a wall, hiding from Ahn. But it becomes clear soon enough that both men are at a funeral. While viewers may initially assume that Ahn’s wife (Dasom) has died, a few clues tell us that’s not the case. Most notably, he’s not wearing the armband that the chief mourner would wear at a Korean funeral.

On the rooftop of the funeral home, Seo spots Ahn. The latter gets two coffees out of a vending machine and offers one to a startled Seo. His reaction is curious. Why is he so startled? They are the only two people up there.

Early on before the reveal, I suspected that Seo was dead and had just realized that Ahn could see him. Why do I think he’s dead? There are several elements that point to this. In the first few seconds of the video, a white butterfly flutters past Seo’s anguished face. In Korea, the white butterfly can represent death. And it’s highly likely that the early vignette between the two men is indeed an “I see dead people” moment (a la “The Sixth Sense”).

(The significance of the 흰나비 representing death was also explored in the Korean film “Miss Granny.” In the movie, Shim Eun-kyung sang “White Butterfly,” which reflected on her husband’s death.)

On the rooftop, Seo is delighted when Ahn suggests they exchange phone numbers. (This scene indicates that the best friends hadn’t stayed in touch after Ahn got married.) Seo smiles as he looks at Ahn’s phone — which looks like an outdated Blackberry — and hands him his modern smartphone. The discrepancy in the phone styles suggests that there’s a time travel element.

But is Ahn in 2012 while Seo is in 2024? Or vice versa? Or maybe a combination of both eras? We get two separate shots of Ahn wearing the uncracked watch and the numbers indicate that it is 6/20/24. Seo’s broken watch is frozen on 10/11/12. Could that be the date that he died? However, if that is true, why is he wearing a different watch than he did in the “이러지마 제발 (Please Don’t…)” video?

This leads me to my theory that his friend’s wedding was the impetus for his impending death. He may have been in a automobile accident on October 11, 2012, but that’s not the day he died.

There is no doubt that the funeral is for Seo’s character. His portrait is prominently displayed during the visitation. But it’s likely that while he died in 2012, his soul is still “alive,” and that’s what Ahn is reacting to all these years later.

Before Seo dies, we see fragments of their friendship about what could have been. Ahn reveals he is divorced. They laugh, drink together and enjoy each other’s company. Ahn handfeeds Seo a bite of something delicious. And after he closes his eyes, Seo stares at his friend with longing. Ahn seems keenly aware of his feelings, but pretends to be asleep rather than to address their issues.

Walking through a train tunnel, both are drunk, but Ahn especially so. Seo confesses to Ahn that there was something he has never been able to tell him. He cautiously asks the latter if he can hug him … just once. Before Ahn can answer, Seo embraces him in a hug that isn’t reciprocated. And Seo leaves crying.

Ahn Jae-hyeon wearing a watch that displays 6/20/24.

The use of the train tunnel to signify a desire to return to the past (or future) has been explored in other Korean shows and films. In the K-drama “Tunnel,” one side of the tunnel was set in 1986, while the other found the characters in 2017. And in the So Ji-sub/Son Ye-jin film “Be With You,” Son’s character appears from the past in a train tunnel. And she leaves the future the same way.

“내게 어울릴 이별 노래가 없어 (No Sad Song For My Broken Heart)” ends with Ahn softly saying, “I wanted to see you.”

Which leads to my other theory that in the 12 years since his marriage (and subsequent divorce) and Seo’s death, most of this happened in Ahn’s imagination. And that the lie he was living — whether it was being gay but unable to admit it; or knowing that his friend had romantic feelings for him, but refusing to acknowledge it — resulted in his friend dying by suicide.

Some viewers have mentioned that the optics of killing off Seo’s gay character is homophobic. Thinking about that, I was trying to figure out other ways that the narrative could’ve continued, while still being true to the 2012 story arc.

If Ahn’s character had died instead, I believe that Seo would’ve followed suit. This is not to say that gay men cannot survive without being loved back. I’m addressing the storyline set up in these two videos.

And clearly, it is easier for a cisgender man than a gay man to survive in a cutthroat society where the latter is unwelcome. This is true in just about any society, but especially so in South Korea where LGBTQ rights are still sorely lacking. In a study conducted by the Korea Institute of Public Administration:

Sexual minorities, however, are far less welcome, with more than 52% of Koreans opposed to living close to a member of the LGBTQ+ minority. In contrast, 84% are happy to welcome North Korean defectors into their communities, and 97% can live among people with mental or physical disabilities.  

The only group of people less welcome than sexual minorities are former convicts, the study showed, with 72% of Koreans not wanting them in their neighborhood or workplace.

OK, here’s the part where I ask: what do you think happened between these two men? Please leave a comment and share your theories with me, because I’d really, really like to know!