Marriage minded: Though the author is happily married, her book looks at a woman not so lucky in love

By Jae-Ha Kim
Chicago Sun-Times
December 30, 2007

Fairy tales often end happily ever after the couple vows to each other, “I do.” Anastasia Royal knows better. With her debut novel Undoing I Do, the Wilmette-based author paints a funny, poignant and realistic portrait of what happens when a golden couple’s marriage unravels.

“I did start the novel with the most high-minded motive — revenge!” Royal says, laughing. “But this book isn’t an autobiography. Sure, some of the things are based on things that happened to me or to people I know. But I think a lot of people can relate to the things depicted because everyone is looking for love, but not everyone’s love will last forever.”

Royal, who recently celebrated her fifth wedding anniversary to local film critic Bruce Ingram, says love is a complicated emotion that isn’t necessarily explainable.

“You want everyone to be in love because you know it’s going to be fantastic,” she says. “But at the same time, you also know that they’re going to end up being betrayed and doing things that will get them hurt. It’s inevitable. But it’s an enticing idea because it’s such an incredible risk. It’s the same way with marriage. Personally, I really enjoy being married. But marriage is like getting a tattoo ’cause it’s going to be with you a long time unless you get it surgically removed.”

The mother of two grown children, Royal’s goal — even as she was going through her own painful divorce — wasn’t to pen a male bashing, “grrrl power” book. Many of the less likable characters are indeed women and neither sex is portrayed as victim or hero.

A successful artist on many levels (composer, poet and playwright), Royal put her English Literature degree from Barat College to good use with Undoing I Do. The book offers an easygoing narrative that works well with the story lines — some of which are on the heartbreaking side.

“A lot of people have told me the book wasn’t what they thought it would be,” Royal says. “Men come up to me constantly at readings to say they thought it would be a weepy, ‘poor me!’ book. I think a lot of readers related to the fact that [the central character] Claire wanted to have something beautiful — love — but it ended up being smashed by a big hammer. Claire isn’t a kick-ass, overachieving city girl who’s good at everything. She’s a normal woman who has to figure out how to go from being married to a single mother.”

Royal adds, “This book isn’t about divorce as much as it is about love. That’s why Claire is so completely obsessed with how all this heartache could’ve been prevented. In reality, heartache often can’t be prevented. We have very little control over those kinds of feelings.”

In January, Royal will do a book signing followed by live staging of scenes from Undoing I Do at Glencoe’s Books on Vernon Theatre. She looks forward to meet-and-greets because she enjoys listening to readers’ input. At many of her performances, Royal has a “breakup box,” where she invites the audience to put in some of their experiences, which she shares with the crowd.

“I get some of the most amazing, insightful and funny things thrown into that box,” she says. “One woman wrote about this man who refused to be broken up. He wouldn’t move out and just kept delaying the inevitable. Finally, the cat starting [urinating] on him, and then he finally moved out. Good for Fluffy!”